Growing Up

Kat is sick...as per usual, it's a bad time. I have to run out and groceries for the week.

If someone feels up to it, I'm in need of someone to hang here and keep an eye on her while I run out for groceries!

I'll feed you !! I'm hoping to make a pork roast!


If you are game, please give me a call....

Kat is low key and settled into TV.

I have had no problems sleeping in several days, course I've taken my sleeping pills like a good wee girl, until tonight. I have been off work since Wed afternoon and tomorrow I go back.

My head is FULL of stuff. I can't settle down, I keep running through ....LISTS...in my head. Even to the point that I am having conversations about the reasons some stuff on the lists are not done. I KNOW what my dayplanner looks like for tomorrow...hell for THIS WEEK...and my shoulders are knotted and I want to cry just thinking about it. I wonder if this is the stuff that "stress leave" makes.... I've been FINE damnit.!!! Today I've been exceptionally cranky...and now just can NOT shut my brain down.

There's a rant/diatribe brewing in my mind as well....about who I am as a person and how I walk the line between worker and friend sometimes. Seems there are people on my flist and in my world in general who don't get that.

I purchased a new computer system today. I should have it before the middle of the week. BTW...This is what I bought. I'm all excited.

Currently, weeboy is whining a bit. I'm scared to go to him, in case I make it worse. Adapting to the household setup, family set up is proving...challenging for all of us. I may have to learn to play scrabble... I got my butt whooooooped!!

I am doing a lot of "paper journal" writing...mostly cause I have been offline and can carry that one with me. Bah...time to try to sleep again.

I haven't put any thought at all into a real update for a while...Let's see...

Still trying to sort out finances for the house and if I'm gonna be able to get a mortgage on my own. I have a lead on that, I just need the energy and daytime hours to make a couple of calls to follow that up.

Still dating curgoth, when our schedules are mutually amendable to time together.

Still "dating", "seeing", being "friends with benefits" or whatever you want to call it, with BFHS. There's something there, but without a coherent lable to it at this point. Regular phone and IM contact, not to mention opportunities in person...suggest that there's something. Oh, and I met the kids on Sunday which was...awkward at times, but ...interesting as well. More about that whole thing behind a filter when I get time in my head to really think clearly.

Still NOT sleeping well, and have a rash, and an intermittent fever to boot, now. And an appt with my Family Dr. tomorrow to assess if this is stress induced or medically whatever...If it's stress, I'm seriously gonna consider my options....this is getting ridiculous. I can't hardly think straight and I worry myself when I am driving....mostly to work!!

Still experiencing some heavy anxiety at times, around work predominently and the whole response in me is fairly reminiscent of when I was working the contract in London...a job I ended up quiting within 2 days of returning from a vacation (to Pennsic_of all places.) I haven't started dancing when I wake up at 3am though, I expect I'm not far off from that.

So that's what you get for now. I have no child to care for this week, so I'm hoping to recharge, clean up some stuff around here, maybe get rid of a few boxes of stuff or at least sort through some stuff to get rid of...I dunno.

Oh...and on another note, I'm dusting off some old skills regarding energy use, and spell casting...it feels right.